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Apr 3, 2018

The secret to long-term happiness and wellbeing are true, healthy relationships. But how can you develop them if our cultural expectations of what love looks like are so skewed? Authors of Happy Together: Using The Science Of Positive Psychology To Build Love That Lasts and married couple, Suzann Pileggi and James Pawelski, share their knowledge and science behind what being happy together really looks like.

Suzann blogs for Psychology Today, writes for The Science of Wellbeing column for Live Happy, and is also a columnist for the International Positive Psychology Association Newsletter profiling many of the field’s leading scientists and their ground-breaking research. James is the director of education and senior scholar in the positive psychology center and adjunct professor of religious studies in the school of arts and sciences at the University of Pennsylvania. He’s also presently serving as the principal investigator on a three-year $2.5 million grant from the Templeton Religion Trust to study the humanities and human flourishing.

Is love all you really need? Find out in this episode!

Key Takeaways:

Blockbuster magic. The cinematic romantic universe heavily influences our cultural expectations of what real love looks like. You meet your soul mate, you fall in love, and you live happily ever after. But why do some days feel like so much work when it’s “meant-to-be?” The SECRET to uncovering long-lasting love…[04:00].

Ying-Yang romance. You start seeing someone and the butterflies are swirling for weeks but then you begin to notice a change in your habits and other relationships in your life. In a mature, healthy relationship both partners are independent and interdependent with each other, but how? Know THIS…[13:06].

Harmonious affair. Passion in a relationship is that fire that burns--that all-consuming notion that if I’m not with you I'm going to die without you. That sort of passion’s called obsession, and it’s fleeting--plus not very healthy. For REAL passion, the experts suggest looking for these signs…[22:14].

Personality Q&A. At the core of strong relationships lies good character. This is where the good in the other person’s so inspiring that it helps YOU become a better person. But do you know the top strengths of your character that need focus? Take the test! Identify your signature strengths with THIS questionnaire…[34:45].

Visit to download the Relationship Reflection Activity. Explore the 3 different types of relationships that we have in our lives (according to Aristotle) and how each form brings out different aspects of who we are and our happiness.

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